He Was A Has-been.

Probably best known for playing second-lead to Kevin Costner (Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves) and John Travolta (Broken Arrow), and eminently forgettable in the beguilingly important role of ‘Easily fooled security guard’ (Austin Powers: International man of mystery), Mr Christian Slater has had numerous second-chances to claim his place alongside Hollywood’s elite. Fate however has consistently Britney-ed him. (The fact that Britney’s rise was actually Mr Slater’s and that she stole it from him is a theory that begs consideration but must be kept aside, albeit temporarily, for further investigation).

Other lesser stars (and I believe, even lesser-accomplished actors) have managed to get the tills ringing (Colin Farrell included) but not Mr Slater. His has been a most baleful lot. Until now.

He returns to the screen, cast against his image of erstwhile-one-of-100-most-sexiest-American-men, as a balding employee in a corporate mammoth. A statistic bullied by hipper, hornier and more hirsute colleagues, Bob Maconel is your quintessential everyman. He considers himself an intellectual, he just wants to be left alone, and when he is, he fancies himself as shag-material for the office tramp. Only difference is he has a talking goldfish. Aha!

Now you see where we’re going? Now you see that it wasn’t desperation that prompted Mr Slater to accept the role? Now you see that it wasn’t ineptitude but unadulterated brilliance on the casting director’s part to cast Mr Slater? Do ya? Huh?

Anyway, He Was A Quiet Man is written and directed by Mr Frank A. Cappello who also wrote the regrettable Constantine. With He Was A Quiet Man, he deals with the more surreal aspects of reality. Like nursing a beautiful quadriplegic and making love to her just to reaffirm her sense of self. Thankfully, it is Ms Elisha Cuthbert who plays the role of said quadriplegic.

As the sleaze of office politics unfolds after the shootout that confines Ms Cuthbert to her wheelchair, Bob Maconel begins to wrestle with issues about his lady love and their highly unlikely future together. What’s interesting to watch is Mr Slater in a role that’s so unlike him and how he goes about doing it absolute justice. (It’s like Arnie playing Hamlet. And doing a bang-up job of it. Well, sorta.)

He Was A Quiet Man is unlikely to be Mr Slater’s comeback. However it sure as hell is an affirmation of his pedigree as an actor. And it does make for interesting viewing. Only jigger-up is the twist at the end. It’s an oft-employed tool which means you’re left with the feeling that you could definitely come up with a better ending but you’re not quite sure what it is.

Overall rating: High 6, really low 7 (like 7.00000000001.00000001)
Plot: Above 6.5 for sure (and then drops to about 5.5 at the end)
Acting: Go Christian! Go Christian!
Watch it again? Only if Ms Cuthbert asks me to. Very nicely.

The train that ran out of steam.

When someone makes a movie out of a book that someone else wrote, you can’t help but wonder why. Is it financial considerations? Is it the chance to work with big stars? Perhaps it is an opportunity to reinterpret a seminal piece of work and thereby attempt to garner a share of the spotlight that would have otherwise not presented itself. We do not have the luxury of ascertaining Mr James Mangold’s (Walk The Line) motives for directing Elmore Leonard’s short story, 3:10 To Yuma, but we must admit he’s done a decent job of it.

Mind you I haven’t read Mr Leonard’s fifteen pager, but having seen the movie, I am certain I will. Not for the plot (obviously), but for the enviable degree of restraint with which Mr Leonard has crafted his characters. Take for instance Dan Evans (Christian Bale) a very bankrupt rancher/ father/ husband. With one son sick, the other one disillusioned (with his father, that is), a wife who admirably hangs on to her marriage for dear life, Dan Evans seems in possession of all the right motives for what the author wants him to do. Which is risk life and limb (his left leg was already damaged in the war) to escort Ben Wade (Russell Crowe), outlaw-at-large, to a train (the 3:10 to Yuma, silly) that will take him to prison. Simple enough, but somehow, I didn’t buy it. The story, not the movie.

I liked the movie: Russell Crowe was convincing as the psychopathic, sharp-as-hell-shooting, barmaid-seducing, camaraderie-and-hero-worship-inspiring Ben Wade; Christian Bale, like aforementioned co-star, shone too, looking like he had everything and nothing to lose (and made adequate amends for his portrayal of Gotham City’s favourite son); Ben Foster was sufficiently bad-ass as Ben Wade’s lieutenant, Charlie Prince; the others, to their credit, kept out of the way by sticking to their roles. What else? The colours. Loved the way in which the colours of the wild west were so noticeably muted, allowing for a gorgeous palette rarely seen in westerns. Loved the music, which undeniably lifted the actors’ performances. Loved the costumes (you could almost smell the dust and horse shit off them). Yup, there was plenty to love.

And yet, there remained that sneaky, Gollum-like feeling that I’d been done in by IMDB and its 8.0 rating. Even though the movie was pretty decent (and not just in parts), I couldn’t help but feel that the story left me blue-balled. I mean every character in 3:10 just lacked a decent motive. Why doesn’t Dan Evans just take his reward of 200 USD and walk off? Why doesn’t he take Ben Wade’s thousand-dollar bribe? Why doesn’t Ben Wade escape when he has the chance? Why does he get caught in the first place?

Too many whys. Unanswered. I just do not buy that there’s-a-hero-inside-everybody crap. I find it hard to accept a story in which everything happens ‘by accident’. A series of incidents that happen because. However, that’s exactly what life is. A series of incidents that happen because. So maybe I should direct my ire (or is it adulation?) towards Mr Leonard instead. For showing us life for what it is, replete with ‘accidental purposes’. That’s life, oh yes sir! And if you don’t like it, that’s just too bad. Sigh.

Overall rating: Definitely not above 6.5
Plot: A grudging 6.0
Acting: Purty dern good!
Watch it again? Errr… aaaah…ummmmaybe…not